This sounds like a job for Batman.

Why would you need cutlery in your room?  What the hell is going on in that house?

Yeah well, a lot of things should be, Mikey.

My guess is Diego's room.

Guess you'll have to use your fingers.

Deja vu, eh Cate?

Something tells me that's not the first time he's asked her that question.

Why would you hide a garlic crusher in a drawer?  That's the first place I would look for it.

Just put it in your butt-cheeks and squeeze a lemon in your eye.

There's a joke in here somewhere.  Just so you know, Cate, there's something you could still do where both things wouldn't be a factor.